The great chilli experiment

So I've never made chilli before. Ed was given some deer meat from one of his coworkers so I decided I would try to make deer chilli. I was pleasantly surprised when it turned out AWESOME!! It's silly I know, but I am proud of myself, I even got compliments from Dustin and Judy (one of Ed's co workers and his wife). So YAY, it didn't even taste like deer, so that was the only strange thing.

My hair is finally growing out to a managable length, it pretty much looks like the picture I have posted, but a little shorter. I recieved my genetic testing packet and I don't think that I'll be getting it done. Just to have the consulation is $229 and I just don't have that kind of cash lying around. My doctor says that it is very important to get it done, I understand that but, I already think that I have it because of my strong family history of breast cancer. A new article was released today on AOL.com saying that even if you test negative for the BRCA gene mutations you still have a huge risk of getting breast cancer or ovarian cancer. So, I would rather be tested after I have children so I can do the whole preventative surgery and get everything removed. At least then I will have health insurance although it may not cover preventative surgeries, and no way would I tell them if I do have the gene mutation. I they can't legally discriminate coverage, but I could totally see them finding some other reason to not cover me. Don't worry I won't go off on a rant about american health insurance.

I look a bit funny now that I have a lymph adema glove and sleeve. The glove makes it hard to move my fingers, they aren't tingly or anything so my circulation isn't being cut off, it's just tight.
Everything turned out okay with my bone scan and chest xray, so that's a relief. I was just really low on my Vitamin D and calcium counts. My doctor said that is probably why I've been experiencing bone pain.

Ed and I finally set a date for our wedding, it's going to be September 26, 2009. It's going to be hard to try to plan anything from so far away, but I'm sure I can handle it. I already have the hall booked and pretty sure my photog friend will be able to take pictures, just don't know how much he will cost yet. I'm going to wait to get a dress until after I have reconstructive surgery, or I could just not have surgery and buy a $250 boob and find a way to hide it. But that probably won't be possible, we'll see. Whoa long post, I'll cut it off there, oh wait, we are going back to Iowa December 19-27 so I'll be able to see some people hopefully. Done, I think...

Annoying rib and shoulder blad pain and what that means to me..

So I went to see my doctor yesterday. I informed him that I can hardly lie on my right side because of severe pain in my ribs that I have been experiencing (or getting worse) for about a month. He gave me an "OH really?" So now I have to get a bone scan and chest x ray on Monday. I hope that it is nothing, but every little pain scares the crap out of me. I'm telling you, reading the cancer books puts fear in me. Pain can mean bone mestasis, my doctor said that I could have bone necropsy from the radiation, I hope it's that. I don't know exactly what bone necropsy is, but it is better than bone mestasis. At this point I don't care how much they scan me, it is waaay better to be safe than sorry.
The leaves are really beautiful here still, they will probably be gone by next week. I laugh at everyone here in their parkas and scarves, it's still in the 50's! Ed and I are going back to Iowa for about a week in early December from the 6th-13th. Hopefully we will be able to make the rounds to see everyone, if not, I'll apologize now. Hope everyone is well!
Missy

My racing mind...

So my sister sent me and email telling me that I should keep updating my blog. The only reason I was really doing it was so that people who don't see me on a regular basis could keep up on my health. It turns out that people read it because they liked it too..so here I go.

Not too much has happened in the months since I wrote last. I had my second recheck and a freakout because the MRI found something 'strange' around my surgery site. After an ultrasound and biopsy, everything turned out okay. Then I just freaked out because of the bills, I still don't have a job ( Iknow I'm a loser). Luckily through the hospital where I go for my rechecks they have medicall assistance and everything was taken care of. So I don't have to worry about medical bills for six months.
Ed and I were looking at his some pictures from his sister's wedding last night. Everything looked so beautiful. I got a big case of 'if only I hadn't gotten cancer'. I got depressed because, if I hadn't gotten cancer, I would be like a normal bride freaking out about her wedding this weekend. I feel really selfish for changing dates. If Ed had his way we would go to the courthouse today and get married. I would do that, but I'm selfish and want to wait until I have reconstruction surgery. Ed has been so supportive through all of this, I want everything to be perfect for the both of us. So anyway, I have no idea when we will have the wedding. I was thinking spring next year, but I don't know how healed I will be since I can't have surgery until late February. One thing I do know for sure, we will get married here in NC and then have another ceremony and party in IA. The wedding here will be small, if people can come great, if not, I won't be surprised or hurt because of the "redo" in IA. So there it is, nothing else new to report, except Ed bought me a new car that I love love love!!!!
Missy